After hijacking a ship, Kroner sailed in from Norway.
He stood tall, surveying the land he would soon conquer.
Kroner found agreeable the English stance on torture. This place was right up his alley!
"What can I say, I am a fan of the classics!" Kroner checks out the Globe, but decides against the ridiculous expense of the guided tour.
"This is reason enough to invade!" Kroner mocks the "Snow Slide" outside the Tate Modern, scoffing at the 2-pound charge to ride on an innertube down wet, white astrofturf. "What is this, Gatlinburg, Tennessee?" he quipped.
From the Millenium Bridge, a view of St. Paul's Cathedral.
Kroner feels a kinship to the Gherkin. "Proof we Vikings have been here before!"
Again, the Globe, this time from the Millenium Bridge.
"Knightrider Court!" Kroner was shocked that such a fine television program would be memorialized in this old city. Maybe he should do some investigating before burning the entire city to the ground? Because, you know, Knight Rider -- Cool!
Kroner places a couple of calls and discovers that all he needs is access to a television with a subscription to Bravo, and he can enact his NEW plan!
First, he befriends someone he describes as "a faster mode of transportation."
They go to the underground; Kroner could feel it: he would have his television soon!
He befriends another contact on the tube. Certainly, one of these two people would get him to a TV.
Foiled! Upon exiting the train station, Kroner's new acquaintances wandered off to buy some food, and Kroner was left with only one option: to steal the only car he was big enough to drive.
Paydirt! Kroner drives the Smart Car to an empty apartment, breaks in, and settles in for an evening of stimulating entertainment from Michael Knight and company. Western culture again quells discord as wholesome, quality entertainment programming turns a would-be invasion into Taco Night. Hooray for Hasselhoff!